Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
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Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 1: Azeroth is Gay
- Spoiler:
Hi guys it's me, Maror. I'm the best mage ever.
Today I am going to do a quest or two so that I can get money to support my lifestyle of snorting arcane dust.
Look if your Sunwell exploded too you'd understand
This is myChocoboHawkstrider that I was toohighlazy to name.
Look at the camera, dammit
I'm riding on over to the flightpad.
Flying mounts are prohibited in Dalaran for some lame reason
It's because the Kirin Tor are all faggots that's why
...Hey thanks a lot for getting in the way of the camera dumbass Tauren
Alright I'm ready to
Wait no
Hold up
If you thought I was going to just fly somewhere without conjuring some strudels first
You were WRONG
And AWAYYYYYYYYYY
Wait I should remove the interface first so it looks cooler
And get that damn dragon out of my way son of a bitch
Much better
Yeah so this is Dalaran, city ofpotheadsmages
Of course it is my favorite placeI should totally make this my desktop
So what quest should I go do
I'll just do the first one on my list because I'm too lazy to actually look at the list
Something about collecting rocks that sounds productive
Alright I'll do it
Wheeeeee
Why is there so much fog all the time son of a bitch
Did someone die in the TV world or something seriously
TO BE CONTINUED
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:06 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 1 Part 2
- Spoiler:
WHOOSH
Yeah I'm pro
Gotta do an awesome close-up
AWESOME
Okay that's a little too close
Maybe I should be watching where I'm going
...Nah
SIGH
Man this is BORING
Fortunately super-powerful mages such as myself are ALWAYS prepared for this kind of situation
It helps to be going in the right direction
Yeah maybe I should have been watching where I was going
...Nah
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:03 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 1 Part 3
- Spoiler:
Here I am flying over the village that turns everyone into large female vikings
Oh?
It looks like there is a quest for me down there that I had forgotten about
I'll do it because why not
I land and dismount
Then I jump around because why not
Last time I was here I killed everyone so good that now people are jealous
So they're going to fight me
No vikings are not very smart
Also there is a chance that I will get a polar bear from this one if I remember correctly
So LETS-A GO
Dammit stop fighting for a second so I can kill you
(I'm the one in the middle)
The one on the far left is another impostor
You can tell because she has a long pole
YOUR DEAD
Ah it occurs to me that I have forgotten how to fight
Wait...
I think it's coming back to me
Her title is pretty ironic now
Hello there Kirgaraak you're looking pro today
Yeah THERE we go
I still got it
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:04 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 1 Part 4
- Spoiler:
- And so, to make a short story even shorter:
mmmmm strudels
Alright gimme that polar bear
Oh man the polar bear could be in this bag
Come on
COME ON
Fuck you
That sucked now I'm bored of quests
Gonna kill myself for fun
Goodbye cruel world
Psyche
Hahahahahahah
Later faggots
Mages can teleport to major cities whenever they want.
Which is pro.
Alright catch you all later I'm going to go hit up the tavern
...That guy is staring at me cut it out
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:05 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
oh lol this is pretty funny keep it up if you can
Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
If you have the time to invest, then it can be really good, and it helps if you know other people who play it cause MMOs are like that.Haku-Men wrote:So is this game any good?
But overall I'd say the price outweighs its value for the most part.
okayNanaya Shiki wrote:oh lol this is pretty funny keep it up if you can
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 2: Wintergrasp is Gay
- Spoiler:
Look at that faggot and his gay smile
YES I KNOW THAT YELLOW QUESTION MARKS MEAN SOMEONE WANTS TO GIVE ME SOMETHING I'M ONLY MAXIMUM LEVEL GODDAMN
Well hello there. I was just about toget totally wastedget totally wasted, but since you're here maybe I'll go do something more interesting.
What the hell is with that guy/girl over there on the right
Slow down please some of us have intense hangovers and can barely deal with non-moving objects
This is the music I WOULD be hearing if I wasn't listening to uh some other song
It's the Dalaran theme
Maybe I'll fight in a war today.
It may not look like it from the inside of this Dalaran tavern that I am toowastedlazy to remember the name of, but Azeroth is torn by lots of wars where it's pretty much everyone versus everyone.
Which is great for experience let me tell you
Let's see- when's the next battle for Wintergrasp...
FOUR MINUTES!?
AAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAA
Hello I would like to sign up for the war
Now I only have a couple minutes to make final preparations before I get my skull caved in by some midget with a giant axe or something
Okay look
There are different kinds of mages I will quickly go over them:
Fire Mages: These are the best no one should ever not be this
Frost Mages: FUKIN FAGETS
Arcane Mages: I seriously do not know what the fuck these do
Seriously, arcane? What the fuck
That doesn't sound like fire to me
I am a fire mage 99% of the time of course
But fire is about doing as much damage as possible as fast as possible without caring about things like "not dying"
That's where frost comes in cause it's got shields and freezing effects to keep people away from me
YEAH I'M FORCED TO BE A GAY FROST MAGE CAN YOU BELIEVE IT
FUKKINBLIZZARDWHATEVER GODS I WORSHIP I'M TOO DRUNK TO REMEMBER RIGHT NOW
So with just a push of the pussification button
I become a GAY FROST MAGE
ALL MY BUTTONS TURNBLUEGAY AND EVERYTHING
UGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I also changed up my outfit for less magic power but more not being killed power
Im sexy
Hahaha look at this faggot
ALRIGHT now I'm ready to
Wait
See, conjured foods disappear if Ilog offsleepOD on arcane dustsleep
Alright NOW I'm
Do I still have that mountain water on me
FUCK
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:06 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 2 Part 2
- Spoiler:
GOTTA HURRY AND SELL THE WATER BEFORE THE WAR STARTS
AAAAAAAAAA
Oh and I guess I should get my robes fixed up while I'm at it
Hey blacksmith you can sew up my torn robes can't you? Alright cool thanks
SEE YOU IN HELL MOUNTAIN WATER
YES HERE IS MY SUMMONS
THE WHEEL OF FATE IS TURNING
uh
I think I forgot how to war
Oh yeah I gotta get my war-quests so I get shards
SHARDS ARE VALUABLE FOR SOME REASON IT'S WORTH IT
I forget why though
Hey don't laugh at this guy he's a highly experienced war veteran and one of the finest generals we have
Yeah the Horde sucks
I'll just follow these guys around until I see something that needs killing
Then kill it
These are Horde members like myself
The Horde is made up of aliens that look like the Hulk, Jamaicans, cows, zombies, andgay elvesblood elves
I bet you can't guess which of those I am
We fight the Alliance which is the only thing lamer then the Horde
They're mostly humans but also midgets sometimes
That's Wintergrasp over there. Every couple of hours there's a fight for it.
It's good to have because there's like a treasure room in the back or something
Anyways we win if we can break down the walls with siege vehicles and touch the magic shiny in the main chamber.
I guess that makes the enemy scared and run away, seeing someone's dirty fingerprints on their shiny thing
We get like 20 minutes to do that before we uh lose for some reason
And yeah I'm riding a dinosaur now you got a problem with that
The guy next to me has apparently turned into a voodoo midget
Yeah the Horde sucks
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:07 pm; edited 2 times in total
SHSL Gang Leader- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
So summary is you lost?
Kallen Kozuki- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
I'm getting around to thatWhite Len wrote:So summary is you lost?
You see this writing requires a lot of very intense thought and I am uploading a part at a time
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 2 Part 3
- Spoiler:
Riding up to the front gate sounds like a good idea to me
Oh this is a combat zone really I had no idea
It's not like there's a huge battle here five times a day or anything
I see a cannon
GONNA TAKE IT DOWN WITH FROSTFIRE
See the cannons will mess up our tanks if they're left alive
Uhh
Now what
All the cannons are down, we can't hurt the walls and there aren't any enemies running around out here to blast
Translation:
Tantaros is saying that all the cannons are down on the northeast side of Wintergrasp, and so that would be the best place to send tanks to.
And apparently Wintergrasp is under attack what a shocker
And Quzeb found a U.L.O.S.E. button of course
So I'll head on over to the northeast wall, maybe support tanks if they show up
WHAT THERE ARE LIKE A BILLION ENEMIES OVER HERE WHAT THE HELL
I think my Blizzard missed almost everything
TIME TO USE ALL THE ICE TRICKS I CAN THINK OF
GO WATER ELEMENTAL
Hey maybe you could attack my enemies or something instead of BOXING A FUCKING GHOUL
You suck water elemental
Now look what happened I'm dead
GAME OVER
Oh and NOW our tanks show up
Great timing guys
I'm a ghost
Boo
If only you could see how scary I am
But you can't because GUESS WHAT
A TAUREN AND HIS HUGE-ASS MOUNT ARE BLOCKING THE CAMERA YET AGAIN
Alright I'm alive again
Back to the battle for me
The map will help me know where my presence is needed most
Uhh
Screw it I'll just go in a random direction
WHOOSH
Glidin' down to the siege workshop with Slow Fall
This is where those dipshit tanks were coming from so we gotta defend these from enemies
Throw on my Ice Barrier oh yeah
I have to admit, frost is kind of cool
lol get it
WHAT THE FUCK
SOME GAY ROGUE SAPPED ME
FUKCIGN ROUGE
FFFFFFFFFF
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:08 pm; edited 2 times in total
SHSL Gang Leader- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
So this means you lost?
Kallen Kozuki- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Not yetWhite Len wrote:So this means you lost?
It will be obvious when fight is over because I'll end up back in Dalaran either way
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 2 Part 4
- Spoiler:
Fortunately my noble Horde brethren found the Rogue and beat him up
NO RUNNING AWAY FOR YOU
Killed him with frostfire
Lootin' the bodies hehehe
What's that? Someone needs a gunner for their tank?
I'M SO THERE
I don't have to steer or nothing
All I have to do is mash the 1 key
(1 fires the bombs you see)
Basically I gotta find the closest wall and fire away
If we break into the central chamber and touch the shiny, we win
So if this driver gets in range of the main door I gotta mash 1 like there's no tomorrow
Hey quit following us you're just a dumb NPC created to make things harder for the attacking team
O snap we've broken through to the inner courtyard already
There's the final door right there
Of course I can't resist firing a shot or two into the swarm of Alliance players in front of the tank first
Hehehe look at all the pretty damage numbers
Okay now it is a race to see which will break first, the tank or the door
OMG THE DOOR BROKE
SOMEONE GO IN AND TOUCH THE THING
HURRYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
Well if no one ELSE is going to do it...This is the first time I've ever personally captured Wintergrasp
And I've fought here SO MANY TIMES OH MY GOD
And just like that, we won
All that's left is to kill off any stragglers and get my war quest rewards
Greetings Lieutenant Murp SIR
Private Maror reporting in to receive quest reward SIR
That's quite an impressive title you have there SIR
Gonna take this convenient portal back to Dalaran
Nothing left to do here
Well, nothing left to do here that I feel like doing right now
It comes out in the Violet Citadel, which is where the leaders of Dalaran (a.k.a. the Kirin Tor) usually hang out
Pretty dumb place for an emergency exit if you ask me
Ah yes now I can change back into my pro outfit
Pro
Im sexy
Well I think I'm gonna call it quits for tod-
OH LOOK WHO IT IS
Why, it's Rhonin, leader of the Kirin Tor, if you hadn't figured that out yourself
And also some kind of freakish bear monster that is jumping down the stairs behind him
Like I said, terrible spot for an emergency exit
In any case:
Hello Rhonin I have an important message for you
YOU ARE A FAGGOT
Well that's enough calling world leaders faggots for today
Unless...
NO
Maybe next time.
Catch you all later I'm going to godrink the first potion I find in the Dalaran sewerslament over the loss of the Sunwell
Shorel'aran faggots
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:09 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 3: The Alliance is Gay
- Spoiler:
AHA found one
HIDING BEHIND THE MAILBOX WON'T SAVE YOU
Oh man this is going to be great
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:10 pm; edited 2 times in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 3: The Chronicle Of My Quest to Become A Great Hero Of Our People
- Spoiler:
Greetings, friends!
My name is Roram. I am one of the Draenei.
At the moment, I'm assisting the noble workers here.
We are having a difficult time recovering after our ship crashed here on this planet, but the Light will protect us. Of that, I am certain.
Today, however, I must return to the ship, which is known as the Exodar.
We are using the wrecked ship as a settlement for the time being.
There, one of the mages has a powerful magic item for me.
Ah, but first...
Conjuring all of this water is difficult for me still.
I am only a lowly twelfth-ranked mage, but my work here will no doubt make me much stronger!
There lies the Exodar.
Isn't it magnificent?
Of course, it is a little hard to make out through all the fog...
Perhaps I should not stand too close to the edge here.
Ah! Exarch! I did not see you there.
It's important to show the proper respect whenever possible.
With that, I am off!
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:12 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 3 Part 2
- Spoiler:
Blessings upon you, Peacekeeper...
It is difficult to show the proper respect to subjects that are moving. But is it not the thought that counts?
Oh! What is this?
What luck! I have come across some wild Peacebloom.
In addition to studying the ways of the magi, I am also training to become an herbalist. I am learning to find valuable herbs such as this and then use them to make various potions, which will no doubt aid our ailing people someday.
I swiftly gather the Peacebloom.
Hmm. I believe that might be something more than a valuable herb.
For one thing, it is moving.
No doubt it is one of the mutated creatures, a sad result of the toxins expelled during our ship's crash landing.
I believe it would be a good idea to destroy it before it can cause harm to others.
In addition, my magic skill is slightly rusty, and it would be folly to rush into a dangerous situation without reviewing the basics of magical combat first.
This plant creature is weak enough to be considered mere practice.
I channel a fierce bolt of frost at the creature, slowing its movements.
Nothing can stand against the piercing cold!
HA HA!
The creature is slain. I quickly search it for any salvageable materials but find nothing especially valuable, although some of these plant parts might be of interest to merchants.
How fortunate!
I have almost reached my destination.
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:12 pm; edited 1 time in total
SHSL Gang Leader- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
So this game is it fun, and if it is is it worth the monthly fee for what fun there is in it.
Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Heyyyyy I thought I already answered thisHaku-Men wrote:So this game is it fun, and if it is is it worth the monthly fee for what fun there is in it.
Basically, if it's your kind of game then yes, otherwise no.
If you play it frequently enough, the monthly fee is made up for, as well.
But the price is steep, especially with two expansions out already, so you'd have to be very sure that you'd be able to get into it before committing to it.
SHSL Gang Leader- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
I see, well I don't think I really want to spend all the money on it consdering the price.
Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
That's probably for the best.Haku-Men wrote:I see, well I don't think I really want to spend all the money on it consdering the price.
SHSL Gang Leader- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 3 Part 3
- Spoiler:
Mages must always have their Frost Armor on! I will refresh mine.
And my Arcane Intellect.
Ah! One of our noble Night Elf allies.
We Draenei have allied ourselves with the...um, Alliance.
Together we will crush the Burning Legion!
HA HA!
What is this? Dwarves with carts of alcoholic beverages?
Have they not noticed? We are at war!
The gall of some people...
Into the Exodar I go!
This corridor is pretty long isn't it
MAGNIFICENT!
The beauty of our ship...it's breathtaking.
Ah, but maybe I should not stand so close to the edge here.
Greetings, fellows! What is it you wish to discuss?
Argh!
I have no time to discuss drunken frivolities with fools!
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:13 pm; edited 1 time in total
SHSL Gang Leader- Exodus
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Re: Maror's Adventures in the Boring Land of Azeroth
Episode 3 Part 4
- Spoiler:
I've arrived at the mage training area.
The portal there is a giveaway, you see.
Ah! Peacekeepers!
It's very important to show the proper respect at all times.
Ah, the mage trainer!
ALL TIMES.
You had a magic item for me?
I am prepared to receive it.
Yes, I am fully prepared to resist the draws of magic.
Oh ho!
Truly, this is the staff of champions of the Light!
I will cherish it.
That's enough adventure for today. Tomorrow I will set out and right the wrongs of this world!
Last edited by Dark Catbread on Wed Oct 21, 2009 12:13 pm; edited 1 time in total
SHSL Gang Leader- Exodus
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